Joann, this is such a tragedy...how can I help you understand?

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Something incredible is slipping through your hands today... -Bethea

Joann, this is tragic. You don't know how much your life's about to change, but I do. I'm not mad, though, because I do know this: what I see isn't what you see.

I beg you, Joann: please let me help you see what I see.

As I told you, my psychic friend Bernard was gifted this wonderful esoteric tool by monks on his recent trip through Asia. This rare, sacred object gives its owner enhanced luck and fortune, and it was given to help you, and you alone. But you've refused it several times now.

This really is the real thing, Joann!

My life's been changing in strangely positive ways since Bernard handed me what the monks call the "Gift of Heaven." In fact, yesterday I found a necklace I thought I'd lost years ago! I was very upset about losing it, and now here it is sitting on my desk. I just can't believe it.

And the day before that, I found a nice sum of money left in the street (which I, of course, took to the nearest police station to return to its rightful owner).

After this odd streak of good fortune, I thought to myself, "It must be the Gift of Heaven doing this!" I couldn't believe it myself, so I don't blame you for being skeptical. I was, too, but this looks like it's the real thing.

Bernard wants this back tomorrow, so today's the last day you can take it!

I've made Bernard rather upset by refusing to give it back to him. I really, really want you to have this, Joann. But Bernard has put his foot down, and now I have no choice but to return it to him tomorrow, if I don't hear back from you today.

I'd love to keep this tool for myself, but I simply can't. It was meant for you and only you. And if you don't accept it today, then I must return it to Bernard tomorrow so the monks can keep it out of the wrong hands.

I look forward to hearing your positive response today, Joann. I have such a wonderfully good feeling about this, and it'd be so sad for you to miss out on what could bring such fantastic benefits to your life.

Your Close Friend and Devoted Adviser,